As a child, I felt the world was full of magic and wonder, and Fall/Winter was among my favorite times, mostly for the plethora of Holidays we got to celebrate and commune for, but also for the magic of snow days, warm baked cookies, snuggling under blankets to watch movies or play board games, and the time spent with family.
Photo by manu schwendener on Unsplash
As an adult, I still find pockets of magic during the holiday season, and sprinkled throughout life. I have to admit that I struggle with the first 3 months of the New Year, as the sunlight is minimal, we are stuck inside with little outdoor time, and it sometimes feels like there is nothing to look forward to. I know this isn’t true, and have made it a point to start each day by practicing gratitude to remind me of all the many blessings I have in my life. But in the day to day moments, it’s easy to feel a little melancholy. In order to combat this, I have decided to build joy and wonder in my life. Much like we set ourselves up for success by dressing for our intention (i.e. starting your day in work out clothes), meal planning, and planners/calendars to remember commitments, I am doing the same with building joy and wonder. Below are the tips that have worked for me to create comfort in my space for myself and my family:
- Gratitude Journaling- It is amazing what starting the day with gratitude does for my attitude, my patience in parenting and with my job. This is probably the best thing I have done to cultivate joy in my life.
- Cozy Space- I am a baby at heart and the first thing I do when I get home after work is to shower, change into some iteration of fuzzy/warm pajamas, and wrap myself up in a blanket. There is so much comfort to be had from being surrounded by fuzziness and snuggling your kiddos.
- Pets- It about killed me when I left home for college and had to live without my best friend, an old and oddly shaped dog who was my shadow. For the next 9 years, as I completed college, rented dog-free housing, and saved for a home down payment, I had to survive with no pets. But you better believe, the day after we moved into our house, I was at the local dog shelter looking for my next best friend. Our dog is an amazing addition to our family, she is so sweet and gentle with the kids, and she has been the best study buddy/ coworker a girl could ask for. She brings me joy every day and I am still truly in wonder of how empathetic and loving animals can be.
- Read a Fantasy novel- A book that is rich in imagery can help create a sense of wonder and coziness in these winter months.
- Display what you love- The Lord of the Rings and Hobbit stories bring me joy and were very impactful in my early life. I am finally at the age where I don’t give a hoot if it’s cool to have a Lord of the Rings painting in my space, and have hung one in my office. Every time I look at it, it brings me joy and reminds me that I am free to be myself in my space.
- Fairy Lights- just because I am a grown woman doesn’t mean I am immune to the draw of mood lighting. My oldest daughter first started the trend in our house. Her room is one of my favorite places to hang out with her, as there is just a different feeling of chatting and spending time together when the fairy lights are twinkling!
- Landscaping- I am by no means a landscaping professional. My yard could use a LOT of love. But something that brings me great joy is being in nature and going on hikes. I live in a neighborhood and am very close to other houses. Half of my yard has some forest which gives the illusion of isolation. I decided this year to create a trail through my garden along the edge of that forest to make a mini park experience for myself. It reminds me of my favorite city park and gives me a sense of peace and joy.
- Gardening- In the winter months, I greatly suffer because one of my favorite ways to cultivate joy is to grow things. I have FINALLY successfully kept alive a few plants and can now nurture something indoors till the spring comes. Nothing makes me feel more joyful than digging my hands into soil and helping something to flourish.
- Savoring the quiet moments with my kids- Don’t get me wrong, my kids bring me joy in their rambunctious times as well. My favorite moments as a mom have been doing nightly laps around the living room after dinner to wear them out before bedtime, chasing the dog/the dog chasing the little RC car, dance parties, and outdoor activities. But it is a whole different level of joy to sit with them in the quite moments. There is nothing sweeter than holding a growing baby before bed time and seeing the way they feel joy reading their favorite book, snuggling their stuffie and sitting with you. Or when you spend time with your school ager talking about the day, working on a lego set, or doing a paint by the numbers together. These are the moments where there is no timeline, no schedules that have to be followed, and no to- do list breathing down your neck. There is just you and your family, and the opportunity to enjoy them for the blessing they are.
- Get off social media and the News sites you frequent. I am not at all saying to give them up. But I, for one, can kill about an hour of time with little to no effort, scrolling through reels full of misery, doom, and gloom. At the end of that hour, I have gained nothing, as there is no actionable step to take, and my kids are vying for my attention against an inanimate piece of plastic and glass. It pays to be informed about world events, but staying plugged into the 24 hour news cycle each and every day is detrimental to my already anxious brain. If there is something to be done, it’s great to be informed so that step can be taken. But if the message is to kiss your butt goodbye, I don’t know that I need to soak in that all day, every day. Trading this time for a hobby like reading, art, and exercise has been very helpful for my attitude. You can periodically come back to check on the trainwreck. Trust me, it’ll still be there waiting for you.
- Joy debriefing- I take time with my husband at least every couple of days to debrief about the good, the bad, and the joyful. We definitely make space to discuss the not so great things that can be improved upon. But it is so helpful to vocalize the things that make us joyful. Sometimes it is a great reminder of all the good in life. Other times, it is nice to hear that something I did to express love was very meaningful for him, and vice versa. It’s just a nice way to stay connected to each other and the reality of our life.
These are the things I’ve been doing to cultivate joy and wonder in my life. Let me know what’s worked for you! I am always looking for a way to cultivate joy and teach my kids to do the same.
Disclaimer: Advice provided on this blog is my personal opinion and should not be used as medical advice, legal, or financial advise. It is always recommended to consult your care provider prior to modifying your diet or physical activity routine. For individual-specific finance/legal questions, consult your financial professional or attorney.
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